Send Me to Glory in a Glad Bag
(Don and Mim Carson and Steve Mason)

People tell me that I ought to save my money
So that I could be laid away in style,
In a walnut box with all the fancy trimmin's
Vacuum sealed to keep me fresh a while.

cho. But Send me to Glory in a glad bag.
Don't waste a fancy coffin on my bones.
Just put me out on the curb next Tuesday
Let the sanitation workers bear me home.

I don't need a fancy funeral
Flowers and tears and all that jive
When I'm dead that won't impress me
Just buy me a beer while I'm alive.

There's trouble at the sanitary landfill
It's filling up with permanent debris,
So make my glad bag out of corn not plastic
So it will decompose along with me.

If I should die upon the eve of Christmas
Place my glad bag by the Chistmas tree;
And when the children open all their presents,
The big surprise will be the death of me.

Sell all my worldly possessions
And buy yourself a case or two of Pabst.
Let the empties be my memorial tombstone.
Engrave them with this epitath:

Now it may be that I am not bound for Glory,
But to another place I would not choose;
So if it seems that I'm headed that direction,
An oven bag would be the thing to use.

copyright 1979 by Don & Mim Carlson, Steve Mason
Blue River Valley Publishing Co. (BMI)